9:51am:

5:54pm: what is alex shoemaker's email address?

9:09am: DIET PAPSI

12:10pm: Rockin sentence of the day:

Lowell is best known for the 1930 discovery of Pluto, which since has been demoted from planet status.

11:17am: Have you ever experienced the beginning of a bad joke IRL?

This morning I got in an elevator with an asian guy and a black woman, the asian guy hit 2, I hit 4 and the black woman hit 5. LOL

9:45am: coca cola cancer center
qkrizper

6:35pm: this post is pointless
the song "When It Was Me" by PAULA DEANDA. am i oblivious to the sarcasm or is that song actually that retarded unintentionally.

I can't decide which is funnier: this or this

12:45am: there was a fight today. that was on the main page of cnn.com. the first one. like, when you go to cnn.com, there it is. I wonder what a reporter would have to bring to the editor to make him say "ya know, we could just go with one less story".

has anyone ever read the text in the the header on the lj home page?

tonight was gay, oh well. moving files is the worst thing any program can do.

9:25pm: This is fuck shit FUNNY!

1:34am: rofl party
the male prostitutes name is mike jones.

11:24pm: http://roflgreinke.ytmnd.com/

1:04am:

Click Here

HAHAHAHAHAHAHHA AHAHHAHAHAHAHAHA

ITS A BROKEN LINK AND IM NOT GOING TO PAY FOR IT

7:44pm: https://www.bestialityurination.com/?page=prod-168

12:18am: shut the fuck up

12:00pm: Awwwwwww, is the angry bearded muslim man that is blowing shit up mad at the stereotype that all muslims are angry bearded men that are blowing shit up.

12:00am:

12:00am: Shanangins
I hereby officially declare shenanigans on George W. Bush. I demand that he be impeached immediately in accordance with The Constitution (Article 2, Section 4) which reads "The President, Vice President and all civil Officers of the United States, shall be removed from Office on Impeachment for, and Conviction of, Treason, Bribery, or other high Crimes, Misdemeanors, or Shenanigans."

12:00am: lolz
One of these things is not like the others.

11:37pm: Jimmy Carter is the man
The local news should not say wreck, its an accident, kthx. Jimmy Carter is the man, kthx. I would now like to share with you an excerpt from one of my favorite documents.

"When in the Course of human events, it becomes necessary for one people to dissolve the political bands which have connected them with another, and to assume among the powers of the earth, the separate and equal station to which the Laws of Nature and of Nature's God entitle them, a decent respect to the opinions of mankind requires that they should declare the causes which impel them to the separation.

We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness. That to secure these rights, Governments are instituted among Men, deriving their just Powers from the consent of the governed, That whenever any Form of Government becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the People to alter or to abolish it, and to institute new Government, laying its foundation on such principles and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their Safety and Happiness. Prudence, indeed, will dictate that Governments long established should not be changed for light and transient causes; and accordingly all experience hath shewn, that mankind are more disposed to suffer, while evils are sufferable, than to right themselves by abolishing the forms to which they are accustomed. But when a long train of abuses and usurpations, pursuing invariably the same Object evinces a design to reduce them under absolute Despotism, it is their right, it is their duty, to throw off such Government, and to provide new guards for their future security"

12:00am: "next year when your 20..."
From now on "have a good one" will be replaced with "have a good morning/afternoon/evening/day" and when some one says thank you, "no problem" will replace "sure thing".

12:00am: I don’t care for Thanksgiving. Isn’t it stupid to feast in celebration of how thankful you are. Thank you god for allowing me to be obese while people in Africa starve, alright, let’s dig in. This post is bound to be edited once I get my hands on a turkey stuffing cranberry sandwich.

11:17pm: hehe

2:30am: sleep
its 2:30 in the morning. im eating cereal. im looking at maps of saudi arabia. I HAVE TO WAKE UP IN 5 HOURS.

2:40pm: http://greggoldman.gotdns.com/bananas.html

12:00am: SWEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEET. I fucking bought a fucking fuck car fucking today.